Baby names

Alice and Victoria for my girls. I've wanted Victoria since I was about 5 years old, so there is no negotiation there. My first child WILL be named Victoria, girl or boy. And there will be no shortening! None of this Vicki shit, her name is Victoria, it's pretty and that's what she'll be called. If it's a boy I'll consider Victor as a nickname, but he shouldn't get his hopes up.
My second boy name is Bass Fishing in America. Because that is a funny-ass name. Can you imagine at graduation? "Bass Fishing in America Kohler, he participated in Art club and Latin club and was also Class secretary." Ha! He can shorten his name to Bass. Or Fish. And his driver's license! Heck, that is a funny name! I wish MY name was Bass Fishing in America!
As long as we're on the subject, here are the things I've tried to change my name to:
Victoria. When I was in kindergarten and elementary school, whenever we played house or any sort of game where I got to make my own name, it was always Victoria.
Charisma. In junior high I was a loser and when I went on vacation I would tell people my name was Charisma and then laugh quietly to myself when people called my by that. I did that for a couple years.
Abubakar. When I got my driver's license when I was 16, it turned out that my birth certificate wasn't the official one, but the temporary one that you correct mistakes on. So I tried really hard to pretend that Rachael had been a mistake and that my name was Abubakar. I then insisted that people call me that. That only lasted a few weeks, but it was pretty flipping hilarious. I got the name doing calls for Mike Fahey, the democratic mayoral candidate in Omaha.
Good times.